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In a bold move to modernize America’s reserves, former President Trump has announced plans to convert Fort Knox into the world’s largest cryptocurrency mining facility, dubbed ‘Fort Blocks,’ should he win in 2024.

The initiative, which Trump claims will make America “literally digital gold again,” involves replacing the facility’s gold reserves with thousands of mining rigs powered exclusively by “beautiful, clean coal” from West Virginia.

“We’re going to be mining the swamp, folks. Nobody mines like us,” Trump declared at a rally in Kentucky. “Fort Blocks will have the biggest, most beautiful graphics cards you’ve ever seen.”

Dr. Bitcoin McBlockchain, Chief of Digital Economics at Trump University, endorsed the plan: “Just as the 1849 Gold Rush made America great, this Digital Gold Rush will make America greater than ever. Plus, the heat from all that coal-powered mining will keep Kentucky warm for free.”

Chad Diamond-Hands, Lead Crypto Strategist at MAGA Financial, added: “This is basically GameStop but for countries. To the moon!”

When asked about potential security concerns, Trump assured supporters that the facility’s private keys would be “very strongly protected” in a folder labeled “definitely not crypto” on Baron’s laptop.

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