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The Silicon Valley Playground Monitor Association (SVPMA) reported today that 2025 has seen an unprecedented surge in billionaire time-outs following Elon Musk’s latest App Store tantrum.

The app-alling behavior began when Musk accused Apple of not sharing their digital toys fairly, threatening an iFeud that could reshape the tech playground landscape. The incident marks the fourth time this month a tech CEO has had to sit in the corner and think about what they’ve done.

“We’re seeing classic playground dynamics, just with billion-dollar tantrums,” explained Dr. Sarah Timeout, Digital Behavior Specialist. “The core issues stem from an inability to play nice with others’ platforms.”

Principal Mark Markets, who oversees the Silicon Valley Corporate Playground, has implemented new rules requiring tech executives to count to ten before threatening lawsuits. “Both parties have been sent to separate corners of the internet to think about what they’ve done,” he stated while confiscating Musk’s posting privileges.

The SVPMA confirms that both CEOs will need signed notes from their boards of directors before being allowed back in the app ecosystem.

AInspired by: Musk vs. Apple: Allegations of App Store Bias Spark Legal Threat