Alt Text

In a revolutionary approach to tornado resilience, St. Louis developers have unveiled a new housing design that allows homes to literally spin with approaching twisters, marking a whirlwind success in storm survival strategies.

The innovative “Cyclone Carousel” foundations, inspired by Dorothy’s famous Kansas adventure, enable houses to rotate up to 300mph, transforming deadly tornadoes into what developers call “nature’s merry-go-round.”

“Americans need to stop fighting nature and start dancing with it,” explains Dr. Spin Johnson, lead architect of the project. “It’s basic physics - you wouldn’t try to stop a dance partner mid-twirl, would you?”

Early adopters report positive results, despite some minor side effects. “Our neighborhood hasn’t lost a single home since we installed the rotating foundations,” boasts HOA President Betty Twister. “Though we do recommend removing all wall-mounted TVs and securing loose pets before each storm season.”

The twisted logic has caught the attention of insurance companies, who are now offering “spin-surance” at reduced rates. Critics argue the approach is just another example of Americans spinning their wheels instead of addressing climate change, but supporters insist it’s a turning point in architectural history.

At press time, several residents reported their homes had performed perfect triple axels during a recent storm.

AInspired by: Tornado Debate: American Housing Resilience in St. Louis