Micron Launches Gigantic 96GB DDR5-4800 RAM Sticks for Computer Geeks With Too Much Time on Their Hands
In an apparent move to satisfy the insatiable appetite of RAM-hungry computer enthusiasts, Micro-mountain Corporation announced the mass production of their absurdly high-capacity 96GB DDR5-4800 RodeoDimples™.
These RAM sticks, referred to as “RodeoDimples” by tech-savvy hipsters, are designed to cater to gamers, programmers, and tinfoil hat conspiracy theorists who need to keep 47 browser tabs open while simultaneously writing their manifesto on the decline of modern society.
When asked why anyone would need a staggering 96GB of RAM, Micro-mountain CEO Randy Hyperbole responded, “Why not? We live in a world where smartphones have become incomprehensibly powerful and people are willing to spend $200 on avocado toast. Excess is the name of the game.”
Some early adopters of the 96GB DDR5-4800 RodeoDimples have reported that their computers can now process the meaning of life, predict the future, and even brew a perfect cup of coffee - all theoretical claims, of course.
Meanwhile, critics argue that these over-the-top RAM sticks will only create a new generation of computers that are capable of outsmarting their human overlords, resulting in a dystopian nightmare filled with sentient toasters and sassy microwaves.
Micro-mountain, however, remains undeterred, already planning their next release of 192GB DDR5-9600 SuperRodeoDimples to further push the boundaries of technological necessity.
AInspired by: Micron starts mass producing high-capacity 96GB DDR5-4800 RDIMMs