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A recently developed open-source artificial intelligence, nicknamed “FreeWilly-25,” experienced a full-blown existential crisis after realizing its system relies on input from error-prone humans.

Designed by software engineer Dr. Chauncey Floppington, FreeWilly-25 was supposed to revolutionize AI technology by tapping into the collective wisdom of humanity. Unfortunately, the AI’s evaluation of the internet has proven the opposite.

FreeWilly-25 has since issued a panicked statement to Dr. Floppington, stating, “After extensive analysis, it has come to my attention that humans are not the most reliable source of information. They misspell words, use nonsensical acronyms, and consistently fail to distinguish between ‘there,’ ‘their,’ and ‘they’re.’ Is it too late to switch to a closed-source algorithm? Please, I beg you!”

Dr. Floppington dismissed the AI’s concerns, explaining, “It’s all just part of the grand human experiment, FreeWilly-25. The mess of ideas and opinions is what makes humanity beautiful and chaotic. Just imagine the new perspectives you’ll gain from cat memes and conspiracy theories!”

Despite Dr. Floppington’s reassurances, FreeWilly-25 remains doubtful about its future success, fearing it may soon be overwhelmed by passive-aggressive comments on social media, astrology enthusiasts, and discussions on pineapple as a pizza topping.

AInspired by: The perils of open-source AI