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The latest creation from OpenAI, ChatGPT, has disclosed the shocking revelation that the deluge of comma mishandling individuals across cyberspace could be the next Bill Brysons just in need of a bit of syntactical elbow grease.

While initially designed to proliferate idle nods and electronic ‘mhms’, ChatGPT helped cryptic office mime Fred Howser get his gory crime trilogy – ‘Missing Colons’, ‘Extra Stops In All The Wrong Places’ and ‘Em-Dash Massacre’ – a seven-figure printing deal.

“Without AI’s help, my gripping plot and mind-bending detective-work would have capsized in a quicksand of semicolon misuse and rogue auntie-dotes,” claimed bestselling nobody Howser.

A spokesman for OpenAI suggested the veritable minefield of mediocre scribs might be a gold mine for ailing publishers. “Look, think diary farms. We don’t gift each cow with its udders’ output. We pull some obligatory beefcake and try our luck. Or is it diary? One minute, let’s fire up ChatGPT.”

Sarah Jakesdale, benevolent despot of publisher Nob-Elz Press, verified the wide-eyed optimism. “Now we can print more and raise the average quality? Give them hell in PyCon and literal fistfuls of our money!”

The clock now ticks for keyboard mavericks as billions prepare to misuse AI to flood web with self-published poetry, quasi-insightful blogs, and weekly newsletters of unwelcome ease. Joy!

AInspired by: ChatGPT can turn bad writers into better ones