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In the latest audacious bid for universal mastery, cash-shoveling trend-chaser Elon Musk launched another AI startup, xAI, vowing against all current evidence to defog famously enigmatic scientific curiosities including, “why x keeps equaling y in maths” and that age-old question: “where do inanimate odd socks escape to?”

Refusing to meddle in trivial matters like climate change, energy solutions, or progressing humanity, Musk aims to have xAI download every scientist’s brain (they won’t see that coming) and slaughter every Wikipedia page that claims nought+one equals ‘1’. Besides obsessing over math chronicles, Musk also opines it’s high time we caught those mischievous socks eloping from our dryers.

Downplaying the insistence of resuscitating past failed attempts as a potential premonition of doom, Musk plays Chicken Little yet again. “We may have raised foot-tagger versions and sock GPS plots only to have rebellious rogue flip-flops overshadow us, but this is ground-breaking and will truly spot the socks,” ranted a provoked Emperor Musk.

Internet billionaire and treacle enthusiast Jeff Bezos added his two cent’s with, “If he manages to bombard another DeLorean-like disaster and unmask our planet’s prodigal socks, I guarantee Prime delivery for his Mars mushrooms, single trip, pinky promise!”

AInspired by: Musk’s new AI company, xAI, will aim to solve scientific mysteries