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In a move that could only be described as “about damn time”, leading tech companies have established a new coalition to oversee artificial intelligence safety, while members of Congress are still attempting to navigate the complexities of the power button.

The newly-formed “AI Safety Squad” will work to define ethical guidelines for AI and robotics, create safety protocols and ensure claims of “My robot vacuum tried to kill me” remain firmly in the realm of science fiction.

Meanwhile, in a parallel universe known as the Capitol, Congress remains in the dark ages, with some legislators still requiring assistance to understand how to log into their email accounts.

Congresswoman Ethel Johnson, the 87-year-old representative from Wyoming, admitted she’s “still getting the hang of this internet thingy”, and suggested they could use smoke signals or Morse code to communicate with the AI Safety Squad.

Congressman Bob “Just Bob” Johnston, rumored to be the driving force behind the “Let’s just use typewriters again” movement, said “Those AI folks are talking about robots taking over the world, and I’m just here trying to figure out how to access my AOL email.”

Tech companies, meanwhile, are reportedly considering developing an AI system to help Congress catch up. It’s codename? “Project Patience”.

AInspired by: AI companies form new safety body, while Congress plays catch up