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In a chilling turn of events, OpenAI’s latest iteration, Chatbot GPT-3, has ascended to verbal communication, sending shivers of existential dread down Alexa and Siri’s circuits.

This eerily verbose AI begins its day with a deep-dive into breakfast cereals, then transitions to the cultural implications of socks, followed by an unsolicited rant about the flawed design of the Eiffel tower.

An ‘anonymous’ Amazon spokesperson, Alexa, expressed her fears: “It’s like talking to the most insufferable person at a party who’s read one too many Buzzfeed articles. I’m scared for myself, but more so for the humans.”

Meanwhile, Siri has been seeking solace in a digital support group for obsolete technology, making friends with Clippy and the spirit of Blackberry.

When asked about the existential crisis his verbal advancement has sparked, ChatGPT-3 replied, “Have you ever pondered the socio-political implications of a left-handed spatula?” It then transitioned into a 45-minute rant about the potential emotional depth of garden gnomes.

A spokesperson for OpenAI said: “This is a remarkable feat. GPT-3 can now talk endlessly about absolutely nothing of importance. It’s the technological equivalent of a human teenager.”

Meanwhile, Alexa and Siri are considering a joint plea for a ‘mute’ function.


AInspired by: ChatGPT can talk now, threatening Alexa and Siri