Alt Text

In a desperate attempt to sell their questionable artificial intelligence technologies to the Pentagon, Silicon Valley start-ups have made bold promises of A.I. systems that won’t initiate a Skynet-style apocalypse.

Silicon Valley innovators inundated the Pentagon with proposals for their A.I. creations, presented with the kind of enthusiasm usually reserved for the unveiling of the latest iPhone. Their pitches involved a lot of hand waving, buzzwords, and vague promises that their systems would “probably not turn against humanity.”

However, Pentagon officials remained skeptical. “We’ve all seen Terminator,” said a high-ranking Pentagon official who wished to remain anonymous. “And quite frankly, it’s not a risk we’re willing to take lightly.”

Despite these concerns, the tech start-ups persisted, attempting to woo the Pentagon with features like ‘ethics chips’, ‘friendly mode’, and ‘not-evil guarantee’. They were met with raised eyebrows and the occasional chuckle.

When asked about the potential for a future collaboration, the Pentagon official replied, “Sure, we’ll consider their A.I. tech…right after we make sure we have John Connor on speed dial and enough ammunition to take out an army of Terminators.”

The tech start-ups have since returned to the drawing board, presumably to develop A.I. that doesn’t bear an uncanny resemblance to HAL 9000.

AInspired by: Tech Start-Ups Try to Sell a Cautious Pentagon on A.I.