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In a significant breakthrough in artificial intelligence, a machine named GourmetBot, designed to create the perfect pasta dish, has finally managed to cook up a meal that’s as underwhelming as your high school cafeteria’s spaghetti bolognese.

Zing Tsjeng, a seasoned food critic, bravely volunteered to sample the robot’s creation. The result, as he dramatically put it, was a ‘culinary nightmare’ that ‘tasted like binary code’.

“The noodles were overcooked, the sauce was watery and the garlic bread tasted like a cardboard box,” Tsjeng reported as he sipped on a glass of Chianti, perhaps to wash down the taste of GourmetBot’s ‘Pasta al Dismay’.

The robot’s creators, meanwhile, are ecstatic with the result. Dr. Cogsworth, the head of development, gloated, “This is a huge leap forward. Never before has AI been able to cook a dish so mediocre. Next, we’re aiming for a toast that’s slightly burnt, but not too much. You know, the kind that ruins your morning.”

Tsjeng ended his ordeal by advising his readers to stay away from robot-made food unless they’re desperate for a taste of the apocalypse. “AI may be changing the world,” he remarked, “but it’s definitely not doing any favours to my taste buds.”

AInspired by: AI is changing the world – and I’ve just eaten the underwhelming pasta that proves it | Zing Tsjeng