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In a groundbreaking revelation, founders, investors, and executives of Artificial Intelligence (AI) have been caught using the technology for some ultra high-stakes tasks such as locating lost socks and determining the most efficient rotation for pub lunch orders.

Inside sources revealed that the multi-billion dollar AI industry isn’t as much about self-driving cars or diagnosing diseases as the public might think. “Sure, we talk a lot about using AI to combat climate change or predict the stock market, but in reality, we’re mainly using it to avoid arguments over who gets the last sausage roll at the pub,” revealed one high-profile AI investor.

Another harrowed executive confessed, “I haven’t paired socks in years. I developed a machine learning algorithm that matches my socks using their microscopic fiber patterns. It’s revolutionary, it’s changed my life.”

The pinnacle of this trend was pinpointed to a startup founder who developed a complex predictive model to predict his mother-in-law’s moods based on her past behavior. “I’m not sure if it’s ethical to use AI like this, but it has saved my marriage,” he confessed.

Investors remain unfazed by these insider revelations. “As long as they’re not using it to predict my pub orders, I’m good,” said a venture capitalist who wished to remain anonymous.

AInspired by: The Ultimate Insiders’ Guide to AI: How Founders, Investors and Executives Really Use the Technology